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The bar chart shows the proportion of males and females who successfully passed their driving tests in an Asian country from 1980 to 2010. Overall, more women took their driver’s license than men throughout the period. Although the passing rate of males escalated gradually, the highest passing rate belonged to female test takers.
In 1980, nearly every second woman did well when they took the driving test. While the percentage of females who acquired a diver’s license increased to just above 50 next decade, it was 2000 when almost 70% of women aced the test, which was the highest on the graph. However, in the final year, the passing rate of females declined by 5%.
The proportion of men who passed their driving test was just below 30 in 1980. After 10 years, the figure showed a ten-percent increase, reaching below 40. Having risen significantly, in 2000 and 2010, the percentage of males who were successful in their driving test stood at around 50.
The essay is generally well-organized, with clear progression of ideas. However, some transitions between sentences could be smoother.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to enhance flow.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea.
The vocabulary is appropriate, but there are some inaccuracies and repetitions.
The essay uses a range of grammatical structures, but there are some minor errors.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear overview and relevant details. However, some data interpretations could be more precise.
Suggestions
- Ensure all data interpretations are accurate and precise.