Some people believe that healthcare should be free for everyone, while others argue that individuals should pay for their own healthcare. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
There is an ongoing debate about who is responsible for paying for medical services, with some saying that health care should be free, while others arguing that it is the duty of individuals themselves. In my perspective, although free healthcare poses several issues like financial burdens for government, state-funded healthcare contributes to a host of benefits such as easy access for low-income families.
On the one hand, the proponents of the latter view have valid points that people should take financial responsibility for their own health. Otherwise, countries, especially poorer ones, not be able to fund other areas like education or engineering, resulting in strong damage to the budget of the nation. What is more, if medical service is without charge, it can cause overcrowding in hospitals, leading to a long waiting time. As a result, service might be insufficient, and its quality may deteriorate.
On the other hand, in some countries, people are required to pay a fortune to treat themselves despite not being able to afford it. Therefore, in order to save more people’s lives, the government should remove charges for clinical services, thereby enhancing overall health outcomes and reducing mortality rates. As a consequence, government-funded healthcare can help minimize the financial burden on low-income families so that they can easily access to clinical services without paying more money.
In conclusion, whereas some impoverished nations like Brazil, Afghanistan, and Guatemala cannot sustain medical care with adequate money, other well-of countries such as the US and Canada should implement no-cost healthcare systems no matter what social-economic group people belong to.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your opinion.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies in the use of complex structures. The essay uses a variety of complex grammatical structures with some errors. There are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and sentence structures that could be revised for accuracy and clarity.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both sides of the argument and providing the writer’s perspective. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay could provide more specific examples to support the points made.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences in the paragraph support this idea.