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Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that they should not go to school until they are older. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the beginning of the school journey needs to start at an early age; however, others think that they should go to school at an older age. I prefer the latter statement, so children can open their entire potential and build interest in knowledge.
Children have opportunities to disclose their own potential at a young age; as a result, they have a lot of time for learning. There are a lot of parents who give their children to preparation courses. In these lessons, children can learn some structured knowledge. Another plus is that these courses can play a significant role in the interest in the knowledge of children because if the child is interested in science, he or she will desire to go to school for knowledge. Furthermore, friendships can be started at an early age. So, in breaks, they can play games or talk about lessons, which would be the beginning of the relationship between classmates.
On the other hand, others believe that the age of children is suitable for schools when they are older. Thus, adolescents can realize all information from several classes rapidly. As a result, their own brains are constructed and come through puberty. From my own experience, a lot of my friends who didn’t study in primary classes can understand this knowledge in the short term.
In conclusion, these facts, which are positive for an older age for schools, make me prefer the beginning of school at an early age. As a result, the entire potential can be disclosed, the interest in knowledge can be increased, and the beginning of friendship may start.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the key points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the key points and clearly state your opinion.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices, which could be refined for better clarity and precision.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage, as well as some awkward phrasings. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected for better clarity and precision.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. Both sides of the argument are discussed in a balanced way, and the writer’s opinion is clearly stated and supported. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments.

Suggestions
  • Include specific examples to support your arguments.