Some people think society could benefit more if more people study business than history. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today’s world, more people are inclined to study business concepts to secure financial stability, especially due to the growing challenges of providing for a family in an era of overpopulation. According to global statistics, the birth rate has surged in recent decades, leading many individuals to start their own businesses, particularly those with extended families to support. However, not all of them achieve success, as their business plans often lack sufficient knowledge or strategy to thrive in competitive markets.
Studying history is crucial for becoming economically skilled and informed. Many successful entrepreneurs avoid common mistakes by researching historical events and learning from the past. Historical knowledge offers a wealth of information that can be applied to modern business practices, allowing entrepreneurs to understand market dynamics, successful business models, and risks. Moreover, history is an invaluable tool for learning about global business practices and cultural trends. In contrast to businesses that focus only on local markets, understanding historical global interactions can help businesses expand internationally, increasing their chances of success on a broader scale.
In conclusion, while many people turn to business to combat financial instability, history provides essential insights and strategies for long-term success. By learning from the past, entrepreneurs can make more informed decisions and avoid repeating the mistakes of others. Understanding history, therefore, is not just important for personal growth but also vital for building a secure and prosperous business future.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there could be better use of linking words to connect ideas and sentences more effectively.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of linking words to connect ideas and sentences more effectively.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are few grammatical errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The argument is well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction could be improved to better introduce the topic and the writer’s position.
Suggestions
- Consider rephrasing the introduction to better introduce the topic and the writer’s position.