the table shows the production of the workforce who are women and the percentage of managers who are women in five different countries
The given table compares five countries in terms of the percentage of women in the workforce and the percentage of female managers.
Overall, the highest proportion of women in the workforce is observed in Japan, whereas the lowest is in Egypt.However,female managers, the United States and Australia lead, whereas Sri Lanka has the smallest share.
In Japan, 48% of the workforce is made up of women, which is the highest among the countries listed, but only 17% of managers are women. Similarly, the United States has a high proportion of women in the workforce at 46%, with an equal 43% representation of women in managerial roles. Australia has slightly fewer women in its workforce at 42%, but a comparable 43% hold managerial positions.
By contrast, Sri Lanka and Egypt report much low percentages. In Sri Lanka, women constitute 41% of the workforce, but only 9% of managers. Egypt shows the lowest figures, with just 20% of the workforce and 12% of managers being female.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and the progression from one idea to the next is smooth.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words or phrases to show more variety.
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic usage. The vocabulary is used appropriately for the task.
The essay uses a wide range of structures and there are few grammatical errors. Those that do exist do not impede communication.
The essay provides a clear overview and detailed information on all the key features of the table. The information is presented logically and there are no irrelevant details.
Suggestions
- Make sure to include specific data from the table to support your comparisons and descriptions.