The pie charts below show the percentage of students on the one adult education center taking a various course offered in 1985 and this year.
The pie charts compare the percentage of students enrolled in various courses at an adult education center in 1985 and the this year.
Overall, there have been noticeable changes in the popularity of the courses over time. While modern languages, fitness and dance, and cookery remain prominent, the demand for IT courses has significantly increased, replacing music appreciation in a category.
In 1985, modern languages were the most popular, accounting for 24% of the total enrollment, followed by fitness and dance at 22%. Cookery and local history made up 14% and 15%, respectively, while art courses had a slightly lower at 17%. Music appreciation was the least popular, attracting 8% students.
In contrast, this year, IT courses dominate with 27%, becoming the most attended category. Fitness and dance have maintained their share at 22%, and cookery has risen to 19%. However, modern languages have seen a decline to 17%, and art courses now account for 15%, showing a slight decrease. Notably, music appreciation is no longer offered.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and the progression of the essay is smooth.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words or phrases to show more variety.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. The vocabulary is used appropriately and accurately.
The essay uses a wide range of structures and there are few grammatical errors. Those that do exist are “slips” and do not impede communication.
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. The information is presented logically and there are no irrelevant details.
Suggestions
- Ensure that all data is accurately represented and clearly explained.