Some argue that music mainly serves as a way for individuals to reduce their stress and anxiety. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
People have differing opinions about the main function of music, with some claiming that its chief purpose is to facilitate individuals with stress and anxiety relief. While therapeutic benefits of music cannot be denied, I believe that there are other purposes.
Admittedly, music can provide individuals with a form of escapism from their concerns and mental burdens. For instance, classical songs and compositions are proven to have a calming impact on people’s mental health, which is primarily because of their interaction with body and brain. Certain features of such music, like slow melody and soothing vocalizations, stimulate Vagus nerve, a part of human nervous system which plays a central role in calming the body and reducing heartbeat, ultimately resulting in the reduction of cortisol levels, a chemical released by brain in case of fight or flight situation. A case in point is the medically proven technique of treating patients with simpler types of Tachycardia by playing slow music. Thus, claims that regards music to be a useful tool for relieving stress are not entirely wrong.
Despite this factor, claiming that music’s sole purpose is to reduce stress and anxiety would be the underestimation of its role in society, since there are several other functions. When people listen to foreign songs, it allows them to improve their understanding of the languages. This is mostly attributed to the fact that genres like rap tend to carry key linguistic elements, such as slangs and idiomatic features, which are challenging to absorb for non-native speakers unless they reside in foreign countries. Not only does the acquisition of these fundamental components lay foundation for proficiency in languages, but also it ensures a smooth assimilation of a culture, as language is an intrinsic part of it.
Aside from linguistic benefits, music helps to bring people together. Different music events such as concerts and festivals like Coachella that gather millions of fans from various backgrounds go to show that music is a way to unite people with similar interests. Attending these festivities can act as a catalyst to form social bonds, since attendees have casual conversations, eventually fostering a sense of community and belonging.
To conclude, true music is one of the effective methods to reduce anxiety and stress, but I remain convinced that it has other functions beyond stress-relief, since there is an educational and communal aspect of music.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your paragraphs have a clear central topic.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction could be more concise and focused.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the introduction to make your position more clear and to better outline the main points that will be discussed in the essay.