The charts below show the the proportion of income spent on different areas by one university, in 2005 and 2015.
The chart compares the percentage in term of amount of income spent on various areas in one university in two separate years; 2005 and 2015.
Overall, it is clear that there was an increase in Administration and Management on spending income, making it dominant during the period. While the higher proportion of Teaching and Researching was failed.
In 2005, the Administration and Management stood approximately 6% as a lower figure and started to rise from 2005 to 2015, finally its closed with 16% as a dominant figure. While the figure for Teaching and Researching born with 53% alike only one dominant figure in the first time but, after several year, it made up 48% with fail in the least year of the period; 2015.
In contrast, the only two figures showed the significant decrease including; Libraries and Accommodation. The first figure amount of income spends was equal 10% in 2005, when it came to 2015 it showed a sharp decrease, reaching 5%. Whereas the second area of university stood at around 16% as a middle figure in 2005, however, in 2016, this figure lost 8% and made it the lowest figure with 8%.
In conclusion, although the Teaching and Researching areas wanted to be dominant figure in the first time, the Administration and management areas made the dominant by total income spend at the finally period.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview. However, there are some issues with the flow of information and the use of cohesive devices.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of information.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some error-free sentences. However, there are several grammatical errors that can cause some difficulty for the reader.
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific details and by making more precise comparisons.
Suggestions
- Include specific data from the charts to support your main points.
- Make sure to compare and contrast the data to provide a more detailed analysis.