Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe it actually encourages crime. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Many people believe that a decrease in crime can lead to technological development, while others argue that technological advancement can increase crime rates. Although technology has several negative impacts, I believe it offers more benefits
On one hand, there are significant negative impacts of technology in encouraging crime. Nowadays, cybercrime has risen due to malicious actors. Criminals often engage in identity theft, stealing individuals’ funds. This issue has been growing in my country. For example, some criminals created a file designed to steal money from bank accounts. This file is distributed on platforms related to events like the coronavirus pandemic. When you open this file, your information is compromised, and it can be shared with your contacts as well.
Additionally, digital crimes have proliferated due to lawbreakers. This type of crime is particularly harmful because conducting transactions in fraudulent stock markets greatly increases the likelihood of being scammed by hackers. For instance, six months ago, many people in my country fell victim to scammers promoting online currencies such as “NOT COIN” and “TON.” Uninformed individuals often lost money because they lacked knowledge about online transaction safety.
On the other hand, there are several reasons why technology can help decrease crime. Firstly, enhanced surveillance systems have become a priority for governments, which are installing cameras in various overlooked areas. If a robbery is attempted, police can quickly respond thanks to real-time monitoring. Facial recognition technology also aids in detecting and deterring criminal activity. For example, in banks across the UK, when staff members notice suspicious behavior, they can press a hidden button under their desks to alert law enforcement. Moreover, improved security systems make it more difficult for criminals to succeed. For instance, biometric locks and anti-theft devices create additional barriers that can prevent theft.
In conclusion, while technological development may have drawbacks such as cybercrime and digital scams that encourage criminal activity, advancements in surveillance and security systems can effectively deter criminals and protect society.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas.
- Ensure that your examples are directly relevant to the point you are making.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. Both sides of the argument are discussed in detail and supported with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be stronger.
Suggestions
- Try to make your conclusion more impactful by summarizing your main points and clearly stating your position.