sevinch
The bar chart illustrates data on the percentage of the UK population who consumed five or more portions of fruit and vegetables daily, categorized by age and gender in 2006. Overall, individuals in their forties and sixties had the highest consumption rates, while the youngest age group (under 24) recorded the lowest figures. Notably, females consistently outperformed males, with significant gender gap observed in the 45-54 age group, whereas consumption levels were identical for people aged 75.
Delving into the details, in the youngest age group between (19- 24), only 15% of men and 17% of women ate the recommended daily portion. The proportions if consumers steadily increased among people aged 25 to 54, with females consistently contributing to highest figures. The largest disparity was registered in the 45-54 age group, where men consisted just over 20%, marking it approximately 10% less than their female counterparts.
Moving on to the more frequent consumers of five portions, it is evident that figures were more substantial for women at 35%, yet equivalent rate for men far less by around 3%. However, consumption began to decline for people aged over 65 and above. In the category of people 65-74-year-olds, men ate 27% of fruit and vegetables, while women accounted for 30%. Subsequently, rates for people aged 75 and above were equal for each genders, making up a quarter.
The essay is generally well-organized, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve flow between sentences.
- Ensure each paragraph has a clear focus.
- Avoid abrupt transitions between age groups.
The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, though there are some repetitive phrases.
The essay contains several grammatical errors, affecting overall clarity.
The essay effectively covers the main trends and comparisons in the data, with a clear overview and specific details.