Some people think technology development decreases crime, while others believe that it actually encourages crime
A lot of people think that technology development reduces robbery incursions and crimes, but at the same time others found that it actually increases robberies and encourages criminals.
On the one hand, technology development really encourages the crimes and criminals because the criminals contact with each other very easily and they can say the bad informations to each other. Nowadays hackers can do a lot of robberies easily. For example, they can do steal from banks.
On the other hand, technology development has a lot of beneficial aspects. Technology development makes people’s life easier than before. People can find any information that they want to know on the internet, and children can translate any foreign word.
In addition to this, young adults of Uzbekistan can develop with modern technology.
I actually encourage modern technologies and in my opinion technology developement is very usuful
Atham
The essay is somewhat logically organized, but the flow of ideas could be improved. The use of cohesive devices is sometimes awkward, and there are some issues with paragraphing. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs are sometimes unclear, which can make it difficult for the reader to follow the argument.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.
- Consider reorganizing the content to improve the overall flow of the essay.
The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are some issues with word choice and spelling. Some words are used incorrectly or inappropriately, which can affect the clarity and effectiveness of the communication. Additionally, there are some repeated phrases and expressions that could be varied for better impact.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies. These include issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and preposition use. Additionally, there are some errors in sentence construction and word form. Punctuation is also often misused, which can affect the clarity of the writing.
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both views regarding the impact of technological development on crime. However, it lacks depth in discussing each point. The arguments are not fully developed, and the essay does not provide sufficient examples to support the points made. The conclusion is brief and does not effectively summarize the key points discussed.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support each point.
- Ensure that each argument is fully developed and explained.
- Consider adding a conclusion that summarizes the key points discussed.