The diagram below shows the recycling process of aluminium cans.
The diagram shows that recycling steps of aluminum cans . Overall, it includes 11 stages from initial of wasting raw material to end of manufacturing new products. Also it takes about six weeks so that the material convert to new cans . Therefore this is complex one
First of all, material is wasted and then deposited at a recycling facility. Before products are crushed, these cans are washed with water in order to clean contamination . The following step is processed with the help of machinery at a place . In the next stage, chemicals substances are applied to erase any paint or labels from the aluminum .
Additionally, they are heated at high temperature like 1000 degrees . After which the liquid metal is poured into molds to form new shapes . After being molded aluminum, this is weighed to provide quality and consistency. Before new containers are produced, The material is rolled into thin sheets.
The essay presents the process in a generally logical order but lacks clear linking devices and smooth transitions between stages.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve flow.
- Clarify the sequence of steps more effectively.
- Ensure each stage is clearly connected to the next.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary but lacks precision and variety in some areas.
The essay contains several grammatical errors and awkward sentence structures.
The essay adequately describes the process but lacks detail in some stages.
Suggestions
- Include more details about each stage.
- Ensure all stages are clearly explained.