Art classes, such as painting or drawing, are as important for children's development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree?
Some assume art classes contribute juveniles’ development equally as other subjects,thus it should be mandatory in highschool. I strongly agree that art classes let us yse our ability to create and can be a great cure for some disorders,such as depression and anxiety
Art is exceptionally beneficial for children’s overall health, and it can be therapeutic in many conditions. Numerous adults are able to find joy and pleasure by drawing and painting. Furthermore, it can promote well-being and happiness. Especially while struggling with some disorders, it has also been scientifically proven many of us feel accomplished and achievement after drawing pictures, despite the quality and reality of our paintings.
Making art compulsory in further grades may impact children in a positive way,and diminish sadness through the classes, which means they can be productive in terms of their studies. If one’s cognitive abilities are in a good condition, he or she can definitely see improvements in their studies. Art also enhances adolescents’ concentration that can increase their effectiveness while learning about sophisticated technologies.
In conclusion, the art, in a sense, can be seen as a form of therapy. Also, it can influence juveniles’ well-being and mental health in an effective way. Therefore, making the art compulsory can lead to the benefits as the example above suggests.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance on the issue.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and reiterate your stance on the issue.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with appropriate use of academic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and precision. Additionally, the use of more varied and sophisticated language could enhance the overall quality of the essay.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and a variety of grammatical structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that can be distracting. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of grammatical structures, with some variety in sentence structure. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that could be revised for clarity and precision. Additionally, the use of more varied and sophisticated grammatical structures could enhance the overall quality of the essay.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay effectively addresses the task, presenting a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. The argument is well-developed and supported with specific, relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance on the issue.
Suggestions
- Ensure that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the stance on the issue.