Social media is increasingly preferred by people over real-life interactions. While this development brings about several issues, these drawbacks are far outweighed by the benefits.
In today’s rapidly evolving world, the excessive use of social media adjusted how people interact with one another. Some argue that this has been a positive development as interacting online can offer several benefits for people. While the opponents of this trend claim that the rise in social media usage had led to a decline in face-to-face communication. I wholeheartedly believe that the downsides of this tendency are outweighed by the upsides it might bring.
From one perspective, an increase in the utilization of online interaction is likely to contribute to weaken personal relationships as if people want to cement their friendship with someone, they have to make an effort to meet their close ones as much as possible. There could be numerous drawbacks of refusing physical meetings. One of the major of them is overusing the social network with a view to keeping in touch with friends, relatives and loved ones, can damage the relationship as there is nothing better than meeting in person. If people do not want to be in a short-term relationship with someone, they should be eager to interact directly. Aside from this, spending too much time on social media can be damaging not only for discouraging real-life communications but it leads people to feel lonely, as well.
However, when it comes to the advantages offered by utilizing the social media to stay connected with people, they are numerous. Staying in touch with people regardless of their geographical location can be a great case in point. The internet plays a crucial role in connecting individuals with each other as people are able to interact virtually no matter where they are. Namely, the social media closely help the one to maintain relationship from a distance. Additionally, this development enables people to communicate in a quick and easy way. In this way, communicators can save much time.
In conclusion, virtual interaction can have many negative sides such as damaging the friendship and consuming much time; however the advantages provided by this trend outweigh the disadvantages.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.
Suggestions
- Improve the flow of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
- Use a wider range of linking words to connect ideas more effectively.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary relevant to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could help to illustrate the points more clearly.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect sentence construction. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of grammatical structures, but there are a few errors in sentence construction and tense usage that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more varied sentence structures could help to maintain the reader’s interest.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the drawbacks and benefits of social media in facilitating online interactions. The writer presents a clear position that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks and provides relevant examples to support their arguments. However, the essay could be improved by providing a more detailed exploration of the drawbacks and benefits discussed.
Suggestions
- Provide a more detailed exploration of the drawbacks and benefits discussed.