Some feel that tourism endangers culture while others feel it is beneficial Discuss both sides and give your opinion
People have different views about tourism.Some contend that tourism eradicates culture and traditions globally,while others celebrate tourism as it can boost countries’ economies and provide additional income for their citizens.From my perspective,countries should strike a balance in terms of tourism by both allowing tourists to explore their culture and protecting it at the same time.
On the one hand,tourism may not always be advantageous to countries, especially if it turns into overtourism.In fact,tourism saturation can eradicate cultures,contributing to globalization when an influx of tourists bring their own customs that reflect on their clothes and behavior.Locals mayl imitate tourists.Seeing them,locals may change some of their customs,adapt to what tourists unknowingly promote. European society where people are currently trying hard to protect their cultural beliefs would be a good case in point since there is a rising multiculturalism due to massive tourism and its repercussion-immigration in this continent.Preserving cultural and historical heritage of a country can also be problematic if there is a continous flow of tourists in it.That is mainly because they are often main tourist spots that attract majority of tourists and at the same time most damaged by people who touch them,steal the exhibits and even leave trash in such places.Therefore,some people may not view the development of tourism in a positive light,when it comes to their culture and identity.
On the flip side,tourism can indeed reap several benefits worldwide as it can enhance countries’ economy and shape their international profile.Improving tourism creates jobs for local artisans and performers who not only can make money by selling their hand-made products and showcasing their skills,but also,their income tax contributes to their communities. Additionally, developing tourism in one country can make it recognized and famous on an international level.When tourists visit a particular landmark of a country,they often share their pictures with it on social media,sparking interest in their followers about the place and promoting it online.
From my perspective,every country should strike a balance between tourism and preserving their culture.They can implement this by calling foreign visitors to respect their traditions and avoid unethical actions that can undermine their society.Qatar,a Middle Eastern country can exemplify this point as people are allowed to enter Qatar only if do they respect their national and cultural beliefs. As a result,it is one of the peaceful and well-preserved countries now.
In conclusion,while people hold different opinions regarding tourism with some of them, considering it harmful to their culture and some others seeing it as a benefit for their country’s economy and reputation. I,however, believe that there should be a balance in this regard to retain tourists and maintain their culture at the same time.
The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive. Clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
- Make sure that each paragraph has a clear main idea.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “European society where people are currently trying hard to protect their cultural beliefs” could be rephrased as “In European societies, where there is a constant effort to protect cultural beliefs.” Improving lexical precision and variety will enhance the clarity and professionalism of the essay. Additionally, ensuring correct spelling and grammar usage will improve overall readability.
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect sentence construction. The essay contains a few grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. For example, “European society where people are currently trying hard to protect their cultural beliefs” is awkward and could be rephrased for clarity. Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including correct verb forms and preposition usage, will improve the overall quality of the essay.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both the potential negative impacts of tourism on culture and its economic benefits. The writer presents a clear stance, advocating for a balance between allowing tourists to experience the culture and protecting it. The argument is well-developed and supported with relevant examples. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.
Suggestions
- Make sure to fully develop your arguments.
- Provide more specific examples to support your points.