In the future, it is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than younger people in many countries. Is this a positive or negative development?

According to the researchers say that there will be a higher part of older people than younger people in many countries in the future. While increasing proportion older people compared to younger people suggest a number of upsides, l personally believe that this would cause several significant downsides.
One advantage of increasing part of older people than younger people is that social stability. With more senior citizens, there may be a greater focus on community and family values, leading to enhanced social cohesion. Besides that people will be kind to each other. As a result, there will be increasing development in our country. Another upside of growing proportion older people compared to younger people is that its possible experience and wisdom. An older population brings a wealth of experience and knowledge to society. Because their level of knowledge is jolly high. They can contribute positively to various sectors, including education and mentorship. As they give correct and clear instructions to people and teachers, including in management public.
Despite these advantages of increasing proportion older people than younger people, it may lead to some significant drawbacks. One of the main downsides associated with a higher proportion of older people compared to younger people is workforce shortages. There may be a shortage of workers in certain industries owing to the older population retires. Then, it reduces the development of the country. Also this impacting productivity and economic stability. Then, a women also should working a different jobs for the development of the country. Another drawback of increasing proportion older people than younger people is the possible economic challenges. A higher dependency ratio can lead to potential economic challenges, as fewer workers may be supporting more retirees, potentially slowing economic growth. The state budgets will suffer due to the number of pensioners increase.
In conclusion, while growing part of older people compared to younger people offer significant advantages like social stability and experience and wisdom, it also brings notable drawbacks such as workforce shortages and economic challenges.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the overall position.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your position.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices, which could be refined for greater clarity and impact. Additionally, the use of synonyms could be increased to avoid repetition and enhance the overall quality of the writing.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, but these do not impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds to the overall quality of the writing. However, there are some grammatical errors and inaccuracies in the use of tense, pronouns, and prepositions, which can impede communication. These errors should be addressed to improve the overall clarity and professionalism of the writing.

The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative aspects of an increasing proportion of older people in society. A clear position is maintained throughout the response, and the essay provides relevant examples to support the arguments. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the overall position.