Many employees can now do their work from home using modern technology. However, this change may only benefit workers, not the employers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The developments in the field of technology have revolutionized the lifestyle of many people, particularly the way how they work. Most functions of the job can be completed at home by utilizing contemporary high-techs. Although at the first glance it may look beneficial only for employees, I believe it has its own share of advantages even for employers.
Granted, without firsthand control many workers may slack off. Instead of getting the work done, they may procrastinate until the last moment of deadline and hinder the completion of assignments. Hence, employers find it hard to believe in efficiency of online working. Additionally, the little interaction between staff members and employers may negatively affect their relationship and make it hard to create a strong bond and connection. As a result, they can not have sense of belongings to one place and may easily switch their position if more profitable chance presents itself.
Even though working from home may have detrimental side effects, it has tremendous upsides for the business owners. Employers and employees can easily get in touch with each others through instant messaging applications available on gadgets. This 24 to 7 contacting method can come in handy when they have spontaneous meetings or sudden problems. Moreover, as workers do not need a place to work, it renders venues and companies’ buildings unnecessary. This on the other hand means employers can fire personals that are in charge of the sanitation and security since they would not have a role to play in online business. Decreasing the number of workers cost companies less money and also they would economize via taxes.
In conclusion, home-working experience seems disadvantageous for job givers without deep analyze, but if scrutinized carefully, it has many ups for employers as it may help them to save extra money.
The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. Clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
- Make sure that your arguments are presented in a clear and logical order.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “contemporary high-techs” should be “contemporary technology,” and “sanitation and security” could be more clearly expressed as “cleaning and security measures.” Refining word choice and ensuring the correct use of idiomatic expressions will improve the overall clarity and professionalism of the essay. Additionally, using a more formal tone throughout the essay will help to maintain a consistent and appropriate level of formality.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected. For example, “they can not have sense of belongings to one place” should be “they may not have a sense of belonging to one place,” and “it has many ups for employers” should be “it has many benefits for employers.” Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including correct verb forms and preposition use, will improve the overall quality of the essay. Additionally, ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will enhance readability.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the potential disadvantages of remote work for employers and its benefits. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the writer’s stance. A more concise and impactful conclusion would leave a stronger impression on the reader.
Suggestions
- Consider summarizing your main points and clearly restating your position in the conclusion.