Task 1
The two diagrams compare the layout of a museum in 1957 and 2007.
Overall, the museum has undergone significant renovations and expansions over the past 50 years, with a focus on enhancing visitor amenities and diversifying its spaces.
In 1957, the museum had a simple layout with three main rooms: a natural history exhibition in the center, a local history room on the left, and a museum storeroom on the right. Visitors entered through the entrance hall at the front of the building, which was surrounded by a garden and lacked additional amenities.
By 2007, the museum was extensively modernized. The original natural history exhibit was removed to make way for two new rooms: one for special exhibits and one for the education center. The local history room remained intact, but a museum shop was built instead of a warehouse. The entrance hall was replaced by a lobby, and a cafe was added to the right of the lobby to serve more visitors. Outside, a parking lot was introduced near the road, which reduced the size of the park, which remained in a smaller section. In 2007, the museum had been transformed from a primary exhibition space into a modern facility, with significant changes aimed at enhancing its functionality and catering to the diverse needs of visitor
s.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and the progression of the essay is structured in a way that makes the information easy to follow.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words or phrases to show more variety.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. There is some evidence of less common and idiomatic language, and the vocabulary is used appropriately with only very occasional errors.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are very few grammatical errors.
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. The essay also includes relevant details and supports main points well.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you maintain an objective tone throughout the essay. The use of ‘surrounded by a garden and lacked additional amenities’ may imply a value judgment. It may be better to say ‘surrounded by a garden and had fewer amenities’ to maintain objectivity.