The line graph shows the proportion of total exports of clothing in 4 countries in 2000 and 2014.
The graph illustrates data about the amount of clothes which was exported in four different countries between 2000 and 2014.
Overall, what stands out form the graph is that there were considerable upward trends in clothing sales of both China and Asia, while the exports of the European Union and the USA saw a steady fall over the period in question.
Looking at the details, China’s exports started at under 15 in 2000 and then there was a sharp increase throughout the period, rocketing to over 35 in 2014. This meant that China sold the largest number of clothes of four exporters in that year. Regarding the exportations of Asia, it was more than China at the beginning of the period, then sharply plummeted to approximately 18 in 2002. Subsequently, there was a slight rise, with the proportion to 20, but still lower than the initial level.
By contrast, the sail of the EU and the US went in the opposite direction. Despite starting with the highest trend, the exports of the EU dropped significantly till the end of the period. If we look at the United States’ clothing sales, there was a fluctuation between 12 and 4 over a 14 year period.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview. The use of cohesive devices is effective, and there is a clear progression of information.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words and phrases to show more variety.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic usage. The vocabulary is generally used appropriately.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors.
The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear overview of the main trends, differences or stages. The essay also presents detail information and support main points.
Suggestions
- Ensure that all data is accurately represented and clearly described. Make sure that any comparisons or trends are clearly and accurately described.