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Some people think that children should grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals believe that children should be raised in the rural areas rather than in a large city.I completely agree with this statement because peaceful and safe environment and alse in rural areas tend to have more outdoor space to play.
First of all countryside is the peaceful and safe place for raising children.The countryside has lower crime rates and less pollution which can positively impact a child’s physical and mental health.However children in city have access to modern facilities like museum,libraries and like these,which can broaden their horizons and foster a more diverse worldview
Another positive side is that children can play more outdoor space because in rural areas offer more spaces.If children play more it helps to encourage them to engage in physical activities connect with nature and be more friendly.This can contribute to a healthier lifestyle
In conclusion,I agree with this option because countryside provides a more peaceful,natural environment conducive to outdoor activities and a close-knit community

6.0

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the writer’s stance.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and reiterate your stance.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures and shows an understanding of grammar and punctuation rules. However, there are some errors in grammar and punctuation that can be distracting. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures effectively, but there are some grammatical errors that can affect the clarity and readability of the essay. Punctuation is also not always used correctly, which can further impact the clarity of the writing.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported. The essay addresses the topic by discussing the benefits of raising children in rural areas as opposed to cities. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay would benefit from a more detailed exploration of the counter-argument.

Suggestions
  • Consider providing more specific examples to support your arguments.
  • Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single point or idea.