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Some people think that children should grow up in the countryside than a big city Do you agree or disagree?

Some individuals believe that it is more beneficial to raise youngsters in a environmental area than in a various city .I completely disagree with this decision because rising the youth in an urban area gives a wide range of opportunities for study and living .
First of all, there are some high quality educational choices to choose from in a city for children than in the village.this is mainly because good educational choices such a learning centers and libraries are often located in crowded populated cities. In other words,young children living in urban areas take a lot of advantage such as opportunities far before the children growing up in the countryside. These days,for example,some teenagers from rural areas come to cities in looking for better options to study
Another advantages of bringing up youngsters in urban areas is very good for live.because, children growing up in cities would have save a lot of money for their live.it helps them to develop yourself. For example, my aunt from the countryside and she always lost a lot of money and didn’t study very well.usualy ask me for help to solve her daily problems like money or studying
In conclusion,I would argue that access to a quality education is strictly higher for children growing up in a big cities than in the country,and they earn less as a result

5.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a basic structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes awkward or incorrect, affecting the overall coherence. Additionally, the connection between ideas in different paragraphs could be stronger.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
  • Make sure to fully develop your points in each paragraph.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are some awkward phrasings and errors in word choice and collocation. For example, “environmental area” should be “rural area,” and “far before the children growing up in the countryside” is unclear. Additionally, there are some issues with word form and spelling that can sometimes make the meaning unclear.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these do not significantly impact the overall understanding. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors and punctuation issues that can affect the overall clarity. For example, “rising the youth in an urban area” should be “raising youth in an urban area,” and “children growing up in cities would have save a lot of money for their live” should be “children growing up in cities would save a lot of money on their living expenses.”

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing the benefits of raising children in urban areas as opposed to rural areas. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the essay could provide more specific examples to support its points. Additionally, the conclusion could be strengthened by summarizing the main points and restating the position more clearly.

Suggestions
  • Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
  • Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single point.