Skip to main content

Overpopulation in many urban centers around the world is a major problem. What are the causes of this? How can this problem be solved?

Overcrowding has become the most pressing problems facing the world today. While there are multiple factors contributing to this issue, a number of steps could be taken to mitigate the problem.
The primary driver behind the rapid growth in cities is poverty and unemployment. The jobs and prosperity pulls people to cities and the increasing number of migrations to urban areas from outskirts of cities can put heavy pressure on urban development. This may lead to poor air quality, insufficient availability of water and spreading diseases. Better education opportunities in urban environments could also be the most common reason. It is the lack of funding in education by local authorities that forces villagers to migrate to urban environments in pursuit of better job prospects. In contrast, students will have the chance to study in a positive classroom atmosphere with cutting-edge supplies provided that schools receive adequate financial support.
One of the most important things that can be done to mitigate the negative impacts of population explosion is distributing finance properly to ensure fair wages and create more career prospects. Having sufficient and satisfying job options in rural areas would avoid further issues associated with unemployment. This could result in the prevention of people migrating to cities with the aim of finding lucrative occupations. The second prime solution includes enhanced education. It may empower individuals to make informed decisions and give them the opportunity to acquire rewarding employments. Take Japan as an example. Although facing insurmountable challenges regarding poverty, they could achieve economic growth using the support of education.
In conclusion, even though job scarcity and low-quality education can attribute to high population density in urban environments, this problem can addressed by raising salaries in rural territories and reinforcing education.

7.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of linking words to connect your ideas.
  • Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, such as “overcrowding,” “urban development,” and “migration.” However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and precision. Additionally, the essay would benefit from a greater variety of sentence structures to enhance readability and sophistication.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds variety and interest. However, there are some grammatical errors that could be addressed for clarity and precision. For example, in the sentence “This may lead to poor air quality, insufficient availability of water and spreading diseases,” the phrase should be “spreading disease” instead of the plural “spreading diseases.” Additionally, the essay would benefit from a more varied use of grammatical structures, such as passive constructions and relative clauses, to enhance complexity and sophistication.

The essay addresses the task effectively and provides a clear position throughout the response. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the causes of overpopulation in urban areas and suggesting potential solutions. The writer presents a clear explanation of the factors contributing to this issue, such as poverty and unemployment, and proposes practical solutions, such as improving education and job opportunities in rural areas. The argument is well-developed and supported by relevant points. However, the essay could be strengthened by providing more specific examples to support the arguments and a more detailed exploration of the proposed solutions.

Suggestions
  • Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
  • Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea.