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Some people think that the main benefit of international cooperation is in the protection of the environment, while others believe that businesses mainly benefit.

There are mixed views about the benefits of international cooperation in people.Some believe that the main advantage side of international cooperation preserves the environment,while other people assert that business is the main reason for this. Therefore ,this essay will examine both views,and argue which point is to be more reasonable.
On the one hand ,there are some reasons why business benefits the environment.The one of the important reason is that international businesses partnerships create new job opportunities and provide new chances of economical growth. For example, business collaborations hire constructors to build new offices and headquarters.As a result ,local people can work and earn a lot of money there.Moreover,it leads to economical growth by demanding taxes from both workers and businesspeople.
Nevertheless,it is true to emphasize that international cooperation plays crucial role in preserving the environment.One explanation for this view is that global waste recycling and controlling waste may be considered.For instance, if two international companies decide to construct a new recycling factory,rubbish around will be taken to it.Then they are given to local people as a new material.
In my opinion,the environment should be considered more than the business.Because, nowadays,many people around the world are dying due to spreading waste a lot in nature.Furthermore ,it has to be told that there are numerous individuals who need to get job and make their living.
In conclusion,there are differing perspectives about protecting the environment and the business.Although ,some people express their approval of business’s benefits ,I am convinced that the impact of international business cooperation on the environment significant either.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a standard structure, but the introduction could be more effective in presenting the two sides of the argument. The use of linking words and cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive and could be more varied to improve the overall flow of the essay. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and restating the position of the essay.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of the essay and avoid repetition.
  • Ensure that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and restates the position of the essay.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and precision. Additionally, the use of more varied and precise language could enhance the overall quality of the essay.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation and spelling. However, these errors do not generally impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, but there are some grammatical errors that can hinder understanding. These errors need to be addressed to ensure clarity and precision. Additionally, the essay could benefit from a wider range of grammatical structures to demonstrate a higher level of proficiency.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both the environmental and economic benefits of international cooperation. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the examples provided could be more specific and relevant. Additionally, the conclusion could more effectively summarize the main points and restate the position of the essay.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that the argument is fully developed and supported with specific examples.
  • Make the conclusion more effective in summarizing the main points and restating the position of the essay.