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The graph below shows that the percentage of Australian export to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012

The line graph illustrates the proportion of Australian export to four different countries between 1990 and 2012. Overall, both of China and India experienced an upward trend over 22 years. In comparison, the remaining countries such as Japan and US witnessed a downward trend. The India recorded the highest point in the graph.
Looking at the details, China saw dramatic increases with starting about 2% export in 1990 and then it increased significantly around to 28% without any fluctuations in the final year. Also it recorded the highest point in the graph compared to other nations. In addition, India started at zero percentage export in the first year and then remained stable until 2000 and after rose around to 8% before decreasing to about 5% in the final year.
Moving on to other nations such as the US experienced some fluctuations over 22-years. In the beginning of the period, the US made up at 10% export, and after it slightly reduced approximately to 8% before increasing to 10% in 2000. In the following years, it declined dramatically and remained without changes in the final year, which around 5%. Japan is also recorded the highest point only in 1990 with around 26% ,and then it witnessed only a downward trend by 2012 with 18%.

6.0

The essay presents information in a logical order, but some transitions between ideas are unclear.

Suggestions
  • Use more linking words to improve flow.
  • Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea.
  • Avoid repetition of information.

The vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety. Some phrases are repetitive.

The essay uses a range of grammatical structures but contains some errors.

The essay addresses the task but includes inaccuracies and lacks some detail.

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  • Ensure all data is accurately reported.
  • Include more specific figures and comparisons.