The line graph shows the level of satisfaction with health care system in four countries from 1991 to 2007.
The line graph compares the percentage of people who were satisfied with the healthcare system in four different countries, namely Canada, the UK, Netherlands, and the US, between 1991 and 2007.
Overall, the level of satisfaction in the UK and US experienced an upward trend, while the reverse was true for that of Canada. Meanwhile, the proportion of satisfied people from healthcare in Netherlands leveled off during the whole period. Moreover, Canada stood out among other countries with the biggest change over time.
The number of people fulfilled from health checking in the US, especially the UK exhibited growths during 16 years. Starting with a mere 10% of satisfaction in 1991, this figure remained steady by 1998, after which it minimally grew to 12% in 2007in the US. A slight bigger growth was seen in the level of satisfied healthcare system participants in the UK. It started with around 23% and rose steadily, reaching its peak at nearly 30% in the final year.
However, the figure for people gratified from healthcare in Canada bucked the trend. This figure showed a staggering 60% in 1991. After a significant drop to 20%in 1998, it rose by 20 percentage-points by 2007. Even though changes, irrespective of increases or decreases, were observed in the percentage of satisfaction in three abovementioned regions, that of Netherlands showed similar proportions at just under 50% in all three years- 1991, 1998, and 2007.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview. The writer uses a range of cohesive devices and topic sentences to guide the reader through the report. However, there are a few areas where the flow of information could be improved.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words to improve the flow of information.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are very few grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect sentence structure.
The essay provides a detailed and accurate description of the information presented in the graph. The writer highlights the key trends and provides relevant details to support these trends. However, the writer could improve the precision of the language used to describe the data.
Suggestions
- Be more precise in the language used to describe the data. Avoid using vague terms such as ‘a slight bigger growth’ and opt for more precise language such as ‘a small increase’ or ‘a minor rise’.