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Fewer young people play sports and exercise these days. Why is this? What are the effects of this?

Sport activities are the fundamental foundation for the physical, mental, and social development of young people. However, the number of young people participating in sports has declined in recent years. I attribute this problem to the influence of social media and parents prioritizing academic performance. This decline has mainly negative effects, such as health issues and a lack of teamwork skills.
Young people are unwilling to play sports due to several factors. One primary reason for the decline in sports participation is the increasing influence of social media, which diverts their time and focus away from physical activities. They develop poor habits by scrolling through the internet or playing online games, as these activities provide instant gratification and a surge of dopamine. Consequently, they view sports as hard work since it demands physical endurance and mental focus, unlike the simplicity of clicking a screen. Furthermore, parental pressure also prevents children from participating in sports. Many parents set high academic standards, leaving young people with no extra time to play sports. Instead, they encourage their children to attend extracurricular lessons or language courses. Aiming to meet their parents’ expectations, young people devote themselves entirely to studying.
This refusal to play sports leads to highly negative impacts. One of these is the emergence of serious health problems, such as obesity and related illnesses. Although it may seem unusual, a lack of physical activity can cause health issues even at a young age. Many young people prefer playing virtual football at home rather than engaging in real-life games. As a result, they adopt a sedentary lifestyle, leading to laziness and weight gain. Obesity is becoming increasingly common among young people, significantly raising the risk of cardiovascular diseases and other serious health conditions, such as diabetes. Additionally, they become undisciplined and lack resilience. Without participating in sports like football, basketball, or combat sports, they miss out on learning discipline and building strength. This also affects their collaborative skills, as they lack the teamwork experience gained from group sports. Consequently, they may struggle in personal and professional relationships due to their inability to cooperate effectively.
To conclude, the majority of young people refuse to play sports because of social media, gaming, and the prioritization of academics over physical activities. This leads to negative effects, including health issues and a lack of teamwork skills.

8.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly structured. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
  • Ensure that your sentences are not too long or complex, which can sometimes make your writing less clear.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.

The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are a few minor errors, but they do not impede communication.

The essay addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas.

Suggestions
  • Ensure that you fully develop all of your points and provide sufficient support and examples for each.