Some people believe that children that commit crimes should be punished. Others think the parents should be punished instead. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
It is highly debatable whether a child who commits a crime should be punished or not. While some individuals assert that their parents are responsible for their child’s mistake and are blamed. As far as i believe that every child should learn to become resposible for their life from a young age.
On the one hand, it is an irrefutable fact that parents are partly factors of their offspring’s error. The reason is that children have a tendency to copy everything and each behavior from adults,so provided that a parent or any adult shows them any bad behavior such as robbery or violance they attempt to do it unconciously. Moreover, as soon as parents notice any change in their actions or see small crimes at home, children must be premanded or punished by them. For this reason, a child is seen too young to comprehend his error, parents are regarded as a teacher and prevention of future-crimes.
Nevertheless, I contend that children who did severe crimes ought to be punished. Because if a child did not learn to pay for his mistake himself and made a conclusion, he would keep doing it without stopping. Furthermore, it is fact that some punishments might have a bad infuence on children psychology, to cite an example they might have a sense of fear or anxiety,angry. It is supported that children must be punished based on their crimes so as to prevent that condition. Children learn to make difference between right and wrong from mistakes and understand what they did in childhood and this will minimize the increase of crimes’ possibility.
To summurize, while it is believed that parent must be aware of their child’s error and paid for it by pu ishing, i am in opinion of that a child should understand his mistake was terrible and be got a pu ishment on time.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, there are some issues with coherence, as the connection between ideas can be unclear. More explicit linking words and phrases could help to improve the overall coherence of the essay.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure that the use of cohesive devices is consistent throughout the essay.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource, with a variety of vocabulary used effectively. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more formal language throughout the essay would help to strengthen the overall lexical resource.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and a variety of grammatical structures. However, there are several grammatical errors that can be distracting for the reader. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and the majority of sentences are free from grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and word choices that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more formal language and the correction of grammatical errors would help to improve the overall quality of the essay.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more fully developed, and the overall argument could be more thoroughly addressed. Additionally, the use of more formal language and the correction of grammatical errors would help to improve the overall quality of the essay.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support the argument.
- Ensure that the conclusion fully summarizes the main points and clearly restates the position.