The diagram below shows the recycling process of aluminium cans.
The diagram illustrates how aluminium cans are recycled. Overall, the process involves 11 stages where it starts with collecting waste and ends with production of the new cans, in this 6 weeks period.
Firstly, waste needs to be collected by trucks that take this waste to the deposit center. At the deposit, the first step is to wash and crush the waste in a special crushing machine. Once this has been done, the clean and crushed waste is sent to the processing. Then, harmful substances are erased with chemicals and heated. After being moulded, waste is sent to weighing machine, which weighs waste and prepares it for rolling. After being rolled and shaped, new cans are ready to use.
The essay presents the stages in a logical sequence, but lacks clear linking words and phrases to enhance the flow.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to connect stages.
- Clarify the sequence of events.
- Ensure each stage is clearly described.
The vocabulary is adequate but lacks variety. Some words are repeated unnecessarily.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentences but contains some grammatical inaccuracies.
The essay covers most steps of the process but lacks detailed explanation of each stage.
Suggestions
- Include more details for each stage.
- Ensure all steps are covered clearly.