Stress is now a major problem in many countries around the world. What are some of the factors in modern society that cause this stress? How can we reduce it?
You’re absolutely right,stress is a pervasive problem in modern society, affecting individuals across many countries. It stems from a complex interplay of various factors. Many jobs demand longer hours, higher productivity and constant availability.
Feeling powerless over work prosses or decisions can be highly stressful. Negative workplace dynamics, bullying and lack of support significantly contribute to stress. One of the main reasons people feel stressed is their jobs.
Many people work long hours and have to do a lot of work. They might feel like they never have enough time. They worry about losing their jobs.
The essay has a logical flow of ideas and uses some cohesive devices appropriately. However, there is an overuse of ‘stress’ in the second paragraph which disrupts the flow of ideas.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of synonyms for ‘stress’ to avoid repetition.
- Ensure that the flow of ideas in your paragraphs is smooth and logical.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic usage. However, there is an overuse of the word ‘stress’.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there is an overuse of the word ‘you’.
The essay addresses the task appropriately, providing a clear position throughout the response. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the main points.
Suggestions
- Provide specific examples to support your main points.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus and is well-developed.