“Some people say that schools are no longer necessary as children can learn everything on the internet.” To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Over the past few years, the internet technology has improved dramatically, creating more opportunities in education sphere. Therefore, some people believe that public schools are considered unnecessary because children can virtually learn everything using the internet. Personally, I completely disagree with this statement as schools are not only academically, but also socially and culturally important.
From a social standpoint, schools are an integral part of successful child development. When children go to school, they will not just come into contact with books or study materials, they will also communicate with their teachers and peers. This increased exposure to socialization helps young people develop better communication skills, which are vital for employment opportunities and career growth in their later lives. For example, in Uzbek state schools, children are encouraged to interact with each other more before and after school lessons. This, as a result, helps them to build more meaningful relationships from early on, increasing their networking chances in life.
Furthermore, schools are culturally important places. The first reason for this is well-qualified teachers educate youths on local customs and traditions, which are important to form a decent understanding of their own culture. Moreover, schools often organize parties where they celebrate traditional holidays. A case in point is my home country of Uzbekistan, where all schools celebrate Navruz, which is the most important traditional holiday. By doing so, both students and teachers spend time together, eating, decorating and performing other different tasks. This ultimately strengthens cultural awareness and creates a sense of patriotism.
In conclusion, although some people say that the internet enables children to self-educate at home, I strongly believe that social and cultural importance of schools are significant reasons for the sustainability of schools in societies
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly structured. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Consider using a wider range of linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay demonstrates a good control of a range of grammatical structures. However, there are a few minor errors that could be addressed.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. The arguments are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the introduction could be more engaging and precise.
Suggestions
- Consider revising the introduction to make it more engaging and precise.