An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What effect does it have on the countries professionals are leaving?

Without a doubt, significant jobs are needed to countries. It is evident that they contribute to the improvement of countries. Even countries race each other about brain drain. Also, professionals tend to go to developed countries due to their economic well-being, social well-being and working conditions. States should make an effort to keep their citizens who will contribute to the country in the country such as doctors, teachers, scientists etc.
First of all, individuals need money to survive but they take a lower salary than they deserve in undeveleoped countries. Although doctors work every other day, their salary is so low compared to developed countries. All the more so, they do not have an owner of property . That is why those doctors do not want to stay in their countries.
Furthermore, they take a low salary, and they do not have well social life. They always have occupations because there is not enough competent people in these countries. For instance, for an employee in Africa content. What can they do, how can they live? Low salaries, disadvantageous opportunities… How can we expect them to live luxurious, make a travel? Besides, employees work regularly and take vacations in Europe content. This actively demonstrates that there is unequality in the world, significant professionals have to leave because of this unequality.
Lastly, people work under heavy conditions in undeveloped countries. Many examples can be given, such as: insufficient personnel numbers, transportation, a lofty rate of illnesses for doctors and nurses, a lot of student numbers and a little school numbers for teachers, and a lack of laboratories and research centers for scientists. As you can see from the examples, people have to work more than enough. In addition, they cannot work because of a lack of possibilities. All these impossibilities necessitate people going abroad.
All things considered, governments should spend the money that they have on people doing jobs that contribute to the improvement of the country. If you cannot keep successful people like doctors, teachers, and scientists, your country will not produce medicines, recover and find solutions for illnesses, and grow up successful students. This creates an undeveloped loop. Firstly, people should develop after they should develop each other, so countries develop. We may not lose valuable people for the well-being of the world.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the argument.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and reiterate your argument.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation, and spelling. The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, and the majority of sentences are free from grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. Additionally, the use of punctuation is not always consistent, and there are a few instances of incorrect spacing and punctuation marks.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the problems caused by the trend of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, leaving their home countries to work in developed countries. The essay provides a clear explanation of the reasons behind this trend and the effects it has on the countries from which professionals are leaving. The essay also presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the argument.