An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What effect does it have on the countries professionals are leaving?
An increasing trend shows that proffesionals like educators and medical practitioners are emigrating from their less affluent countries to pursue work opportunities in wealthier nations I think this problem can be attributed to better salarys and improving work condition.
There are several causes why number of proffisionals increased. Firstly, improving work condition can be one of the causes. Improving worle condition is crucial for employee well-being, productivity and job satisfaction. Furthermore, good salary abroad. Good salary can be depends on various factors, such as job, location, experience and etc.If person works as a dentist, they.. can earn well in their own country, but if they work is not appreciated, they will go to another country where their work is appreciated.
Emigrating professionals like educator and medical practitioners can lead several problems such as loss of generations of talent and healthcare education crisis.Firstly,The loss of young talents will greatly affect the country because there are no teachers, they simply will not have anyone to learn from.Moreover, crisis in health and education will also affect countries.The loss of doctors and teachers could lead to staff shortages in hospitals and schools, resulting in a decline in the quality of services and limited access to essential health care and education.For example, the exodus of teachers from China to Singapore has created a problem with a shortage of teachers.
To conclude, improving work conditions and good cause why professionals like doctors and tutors emigrating.These effects have a negative impact such as loss young talents and crisis in health and education.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the thesis.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and reiterate the thesis.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of vocabulary relevant to the topic, such as “emigrating professionals,” “work conditions,” and “healthcare education crisis.” However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices, such as “good salary can be depends on various factors” and “they work is not appreciated.”
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar and punctuation. However, these do not detract from the overall clarity. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which helps to maintain reader interest. However, there are some grammatical errors that can be distracting, such as “Good salary can be depends on various factors” and “they work is not appreciated.” Additionally, there are some issues with punctuation and subject-verb agreement that can affect the overall clarity of the essay.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind the emigration of professionals to more affluent countries and the problems this can cause. The writer presents a clear explanation of the factors contributing to this trend, such as better salaries and work conditions, and the resulting issues, such as the loss of generations of talent and a healthcare education crisis. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support these points and by offering a more in-depth analysis of the potential solutions to these problems.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Provide a more in-depth analysis of the potential solutions to the problems caused by the emigration of professionals.