Chart and table provide allocation of men and women for the household activities, apart from paid work, in 2008 in the UK.
The chart reveals the data about household activities and leisure activities of men and women in UK with one-year period of time in 2008.
It is clear that the biggest proportion have been taken by the activities which are TV, Video, Radio among the leisure activities ,however, cooking and washing was the dominant ones in household activities. The least amount of time was spent for sport and the repair. Additionally, according to the diagrams women spent more time for doing such an activities compared to men.
According to the diagrams, Tv , video , radio is the activities which were the most time spent over leisure activities with 137 for men and 118 minutes for women per day, respectively. But when it comes to household activities cooking and washing was the great ones by spending nearly 75 minutes for women and around 25 minutes for men per day.
The least time was spent for repair sport or ironing and activities like these. For sport men alloted 15 minutes but woman were spent 11 minutes per day. Reading was the mediocre with spending 18 minutes for men and 19 minutes for women. Women spent around 25 minutes for shopping and ironing while the men spent more than 25 for shopping but for washing nearly 10 minutes spent per day.
The essay is logically organized and presents a clear overview of the data. However, there are some issues with the flow of information and the use of cohesive devices.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of information.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary and there is some evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, and the majority of sentences are free from grammatical errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect grammar and word order.
The essay provides a clear overview of the data and makes appropriate comparisons. The key features of the data are identified and described, but there is room for more detailed analysis.
Suggestions
- Provide a more detailed analysis of the data, including explanations for the trends and patterns observed.
- Make sure to address all parts of the task prompt, if applicable.