Despite better education, some adults unable to write and read . What are the disadvantages people are having ? What should the governments do to avoid this ?

Inspite of well structed educational systems, more adults are still illiteracy.
Because of this cause, it can bring some drawbacks. However, government organizations can reduce this situation.
To start, most of young people do not aware of how to write or even read. That can be reason for a lot of disadvantages site for their life and their future job. First of all, adults who are unable to literacy skills, they cannot work for much money. Because, most well paid jobs are required to well educational level. So that, those adults do not work in such places or even simple jobs. For instance , being waiter is also depend on writing and reading. And also, these kind of adults are not find their way in the future and then they cannot develop. They may lose their hope and motivation for the future. In this case, the number of criminals are increased. This kind of illiteracy can change adults and badly effected their future.
Illiteracy not only impact for these adults and also it can reduce this governments economy. While this illiteracy becoming seriously problems, government and educational organizations can reduce or even completely solve this problems. There are many solutions that government should do. One of them is that, each government must set up compulsory education system for their adults free of charge. This is one of the main reason that illiteracy. Because in most countries getting educational is not free or even expensive activity. In this countries government should reduce or even cancel this expenses for local young people. Moreover, the special organization of government also should control the quality of education. So that, canceling the price of studying and controlling the quality is a key of reducing this illiteracy and prevent the disadvantages above.
In conclusion , while the number of adults who do not aware of reading and writing is increased these days. And it can be reason for badly impact to these adults’ future life and job, additionally it can reduce the government economy. However , governments can prevent this situations by canceling the cost of study and controlling the quality of educations.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the government’s role in addressing the issue of illiteracy.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to link all the supporting points back to the main argument to ensure full coherence.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there are some issues with word form and agreement that could be addressed. The essay demonstrates a good control of a wide range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and subject-verb agreement that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the disadvantages of illiteracy and suggesting ways for the government to address the issue. The writer’s position is clear throughout the essay, and the ideas are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the essay could benefit from a more formal tone and style, as some expressions are a bit informal and could be revised for appropriateness.