Fewer young people play sports and exercise these days. Why is this? What are the effects of this?
Sport have been long a popular way to stay active , build teamwork, and you can keep a fit . However, in recent years, there has been a distnict decline in the number of people who play sports as a form of exercise. This trend raises concerns as it affects not only phscial health but also social and mental well being.
Modern life is fast-paced and , many people struggle to balance work,family and other responsibilities.With limited time , indiuvdals often choose quick , solitary exercise like jogging or using a home treadmill rather than participating in team sports,which require scheduling and coordination.
Fewer people playing sports means fewer individuals meeting the recommended levels of physical activity, leading to an increase in obesity , cardiovascular diseases ,and other health issues. The decrease in sports participation as a form of exercise is driven by technological distractions , busy schedules , limited acces , and changing cultural norms. this trend has significant implacations for both individuals and society, including deteriorating physical health, reduced social engagement, and missed oppportunites for skill development . to reverse this trend , efforts must be made to promote sports though accessible programs , education on health benefits, and fostering a culture of active living. By addressing these challenges , we can encourage more people to embrace sports as a vital part of a healthy lifestyle .
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the flow of ideas and the use of cohesive devices.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your ideas.
- Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage, as well as some issues with sentence structure.
The essay addresses the task and provides a relevant response to the prompt. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single point or idea.