Skip to main content

Fewer young people play sports and exercise these days. Why is this? What are the effects of this?

In today’s world, an increasing number of young people are not living physically active lives. I believe this trend has negative consequences for their health and social development.
One major reason for this issue is that many young people spend most of their time in front of screens, either playing video games or watching short videos. These activities provide instant gratification and entertainment, making them highly addictive. As a result, young people spend long hours sitting and become less physically active. International health organizations report that the average teenager spends over seven hours online daily.
Another reason is the pressure from parents to achieve academic success. Many parents set high academic standards for their children and often enroll them in additional lessons after school. While their intentions may be good, this strict focus on education leaves children with little or no time to participate in sports or recreational activities, such as team games with friends.
This lack of physical activity has serious consequences. Many young people face health problems such as obesity and heart diseases due to their inactive lifestyles. Furthermore, playing sports is important for developing discipline and teamwork skills. Those who miss out on sports during childhood may find it difficult to build these essential skills later in life.
In conclusion, the increasing use of technology and academic pressure are key reasons why young people are becoming less active. Encouraging a balanced lifestyle that includes both physical activities and education is crucial for their health and overall development. Parents, schools, and communities must work together to promote the importance of sports and active living.

7.5

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly structured. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
  • Ensure that your sentences are not too long or complex, which can sometimes make your writing less clear.

The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.

The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. There are few grammatical errors, but they do not impede communication.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant reasons for the decrease in physical activity among young people and discusses the effects of this trend on health and social development. The ideas are well-developed and supported with relevant examples. However, the essay could benefit from a more detailed exploration of the topic.

Suggestions
  • Consider providing more specific examples to support your points.
  • Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single idea or argument.