Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports?
Fewer youth people play sports these days.This essay will explore the reasons behind this problem and suggest some possible solutions to tackle it.
One major reason for not doing sports is the lack of facilities.The gym should be appropriate for classes and good nutrition.For instance the price of gym should be affordable for young people budget and also the price of proteins. Another cause it is inactive lifestyle.Teens spend their time for liking reels and playing computer games.Not planning their time correctly and don’t worrying about their body and health.For example young people in this times living in virtual life not being active.
To tackle this problem government should give privilege to young sportsmen while they apply to universities. Because sports mens don’t have any time to study the should do more sports instead of this.The people who do sports they use more physical skills in place of mental. Another effective solution it is increasing sports facilities in neighborhoods and educational
institutions. In order for many young men to play sports, a special gym is needed for classes, if the number of amateurs and beginners increases, then institutions need to be expanded.
In conclusion ,parents and mentors should guide young men in the right direction and not leave extra hours for rest.And the most important thing is to teach children to be independent and restrained in a word, a man. And as a result necessaries is the supporting young men and providing conditions for playing sports.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay is structured with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which helps in organizing the information. However, there are some issues with coherence in the body paragraphs, as the ideas are not always clearly connected. The use of cohesive devices is somewhat repetitive and could be improved to enhance the overall flow of the essay. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and providing a clear final thought.
Suggestions
- Try to use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and provides a clear final thought.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of vocabulary related to the topic of sports and youth engagement. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy. Additionally, the use of more varied and precise language could help to convey the ideas more effectively.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, punctuation and spelling. However, these errors do not generally impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows an attempt to use complex language. However, there are some grammatical errors that can affect the clarity of the message. Proofreading is recommended to correct errors and improve the overall quality of the writing. Additionally, the use of more varied sentence structures could help to make the writing more engaging and dynamic.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind the decrease in youth participation in sports and suggesting potential solutions. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, with the writer providing specific examples to support the points made. However, the essay could benefit from a more formal tone and style to better fit the task requirements. Additionally, the conclusion could be more comprehensive in summarizing the main points and reiterating the suggested solutions.
Suggestions
- Ensure that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the suggested solutions.