Health services are a basic necessity. However, private companies have made them quite costly for ordinary individuals. Do the advantages of private health care outweigh its disadvantages?
Health services are very crucial, but private corporations have made them expensive for low paid individuals. I strongly believe that we should shoe the lights on the free public hospitals, making them more accessible, but also there are many reasons why Private treatment is better nowadays
Majority of us would like to have more comfort while having a healthcare, that is the one of the pros of private hospitals. They generally have less waiting times, queues and private rooms, where many facilities, such as TV, are provided. Moreover, specialists provided by these companies in most cases are more qualified, so the process of treat would be more effective from public ones.
Nevertheless, these hospitals are basically more expensive, even if patient have a health insurance that covers most of the cost; this creates an inequality of social classes. There are a number of areas, where free healthcare services does not fit the standarts. Yes, individual can get free healthcare in developed countries, but in Africa and South America, where fatal diseases are a common problem, even children cannot be provided a proper treatment. In my country, for instance, in more remote places hospitals need to be reconstructed, but instead, authorities mostly decide to expand the capital city because it is more beneficial for them. As a result, we have issues such as inequality, lack of free appropriate treatment and high-priced private.
In common, although there is a fact of effectiveness of private hospitals, it is vital to contribute the modernization of public ones to make sure lower-middle class will receive even the basic healthcare service
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the progression of ideas a bit difficult to follow. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your ideas in each paragraph.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource, with a variety of vocabulary used effectively. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and precision.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad grammatical range. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect sentence construction that could be revised for clarity and precision.
The essay addresses the task effectively and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position and supporting it with relevant examples. However, the argument could be more fully developed, and the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the stance.
Suggestions
- Ensure that the argument is fully developed and supported with specific examples.
- Make sure to fully explain how the examples are relevant to the argument.