IELTS Problem Solution Essay Question An increasing number of professionals, such as doctors and teachers, are leaving their own poorer countries to work in developed countries. What problems does this cause? What can be done to deal with this situation?
Nowadays more and more highly-skilled employees including doctors and teachers from underdeveloped countries are moving to developed ones on purpose of working. İn this essay, I will focus on potential consequences of this trend as well as providing viable clues to cope with this modification.
İt is an undeniable truth that losing professional people costs a lot for poor countries. One probable shortcoming of this situation would be lack of expertise in healthcare and educational fields. This, in turn, leads to poor quality healthcare services and failing of educational settings in underdeveloped countries. Besides, all of these may create financial problems to the population. This is because people need to go other countries in search of better treatment for their illness and are obliged to study at foreign universities to attain higher education.
However, there are certain measures that can be taken to discourage professionals leaving their homelands. Firstly, by creating enough job positions governments can ensure staying of doctors and teachers. İn some cases, this action itself is not enough, so giving financial aids and increasing salaries of experts are also regarded as good solutions to hold professional employees. Moreover, providing this type of people with free or assisted working holidays or houses can be also practical steps for authorities to combat against this trend.
In conclusion, although some experts such as doctors and teachers are leaving their countries to work in rich states and causing sensible problems such as poor quality healthcare and educational systems to their nations, by ensuring enough job opportunities and higher wages for such employees, officials can modify this shift.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction and conclusion are clear and relevant. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved.
“İt is an undeniable truth” – The use of “İt is an undeniable truth” is a bit awkward and can be more smoothly integrated into the sentence.
“This, in turn, leads to poor quality healthcare services and failing of educational settings” – The phrase “failing of educational settings” is not as clear or direct as it could be. It may be better to say “deterioration in educational services”.
Suggestions
- Improve the flow of ideas by using more cohesive devices.
- Use a wider range of linking words to connect ideas more effectively.
The essay uses a good range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
“this action itself is not enough, so giving financial aids and increasing salaries of experts are also regarded as good solutions” – “Financial aids” should be “financial aid” and “experts” should be “specialists” for correct usage.
“providing this type of people with free or assisted working holidays or houses” – “providing these professionals with free or subsidized housing or housing provisions” would be more appropriate.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect sentence construction.
“this action itself is not enough, so giving financial aids and increasing salaries of experts are also regarded as good solutions” – “so providing financial aid and increasing the salaries of experts are also considered good solutions” would be more grammatically correct.
“providing this type of people with free or assisted working holidays or houses” – “providing these professionals with free or assisted housing or housing provisions” would be more grammatically correct.
The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single main idea and is well-developed.