In many countries, a small number of people earn extremely high salaries. Some people believe that this is good for the country, but others think that governments should not allow salaries above a certain level. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In most nations, extremely well-paid jobs belong to small per cent of people. It is believed that this is good for the government by some individuals, but rest of them think the salaries should be balanced by a certain level.
On the one hand, having people who earn noticeably higher in society might be good. The reason is that they can be motive for being well-educated. Furthermore, well-paid individuals are able to donate for some particular charities or poor people. This improves the relationship among people by showing kindness and welcoming. Finally, well-off people are willing to do more changes both in their and others’ lives. Because, they do not face any stress or anxious thanks to their future.
On the other hand, having less well-paid jobs in society might cause negative changes. Firstly, the chance of getting top jobs is so challenging and only few workers may be accepted for these positions. It might urge some people for immigrating another countries. In addition, the harrassment might be increased among people for the rich. As they are doing the same job, but getting less salary compared to the the well-off individuals.
To conclude, while I believe that having extremely well-paid jobs can bring benefits, such as motivating others and contributing to social good, there are also negative aspects, such as income inequality and social tension.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.

Suggestions

Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your opinion.

The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there are some sentences that could be rephrased for better clarity. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and shows a good control of grammar and punctuation. However, there are a few minor errors that do not significantly impact the overall readability. Additionally, some sentences could be rephrased for better clarity and flow.

The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the discussion could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the topic by discussing both views and providing the writer’s opinion. However, the discussion could be more fully developed, with more specific examples to support the points made. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s opinion.