In many countries, there is a growing gap between the technical skills of younger people and those over the age of 50. What problems does this cause and what solutions could minimize the problems?
In numerous countries, there is an increasing gap among those more than 50 age and younger generation. This essay will discuss the key reasons behind it and offers effective solutions to address it.
One major cause of this problem is using old phones. Nowadays, old people only use old telephones, which has only calling and message function. This factor is pretending old generation to learn the technical skills and adapt modern life. For example, in Uzbekistan majority of elderly people do not know how to use modern mobile phones because of old phones. Furthermore, old generation has wrong mindset, which they consider modern develpment as a danger. Old people believe that smartphones are harmful for health, which is the main incorrect opinion in modern life. Therefore, tehy never interested in that.
One possible solution to this problem is organizing measures, which is based on explaining the benefits of the technical skills. This method helps older people to understand modern life and move together with tense. Moreover, another solution is making the phones cheaper for old people. That method inspires old generation to buy modern phones and helps them to learn technical skills. For example, in Australia, government made discount to phones for only elderly generation and developed their technical skills.
In conclusion, old phones and mindset are the main causes of this problem, we can solve it by organizing measures and making discount to phones for old people.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and providing a clear final thought.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to link all the sentences in a paragraph to the main idea of the paragraph.
The essay uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. The essay demonstrates a good command of a range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as “technical skills,” “old generation,” and “modern life.” However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices, such as “pretending old generation to learn the technical skills,” which should be “preventing the older generation from learning technical skills.” Additionally, there are some errors in word form and spelling that can be distracting.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are some errors in grammar, but these do not impede communication. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, which adds some variety and interest to the writing. However, there are some grammatical errors that can affect the clarity and readability of the essay, such as “old generation to learn the technical skills and adapt modern life,” which should be “older generation from learning technical skills and adapting to modern life.” Additionally, there are some errors in verb tense and agreement that can be distracting.
The essay addresses the task effectively and provides a clear position throughout the response. However, the essay could provide more specific examples to support the arguments. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind the gap in technical skills between the older and younger generations and suggesting potential solutions. The writer provides a clear explanation of the factors contributing to this issue, such as the use of old phones and the outdated mindset of the older generation. However, the essay could benefit from more specific examples and a deeper exploration of the proposed solutions to strengthen the argument.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Provide a deeper analysis of the proposed solutions to strengthen the argument.