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In some cities public parks and open spaces are being changed into gardens where local residents can grow their own fruit and vegatables. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some cities are letting local residents plant fruit and vegetables of their own by turning public parks and open spaces into gardens. The downsides of such transformation can include limited accessibility and environmental risks but these downsides are outweighed by the advantages of educational opportunities and health benefits.
On the one hand, not all residents may not take part in growing plants because of inappropriate physical ability, lack of time and interest. This neglect by local people can left the allocated area unused, leading to poor management of city structure and weak tourism. Since locals do not use the area properly, planting vegetables or fruits, the attractiveness of city declines due to no care to the earth. The number of tourists visiting to particular city, as a result, starts seeing decrease, followed by city revenue coming from tourism, because of lack of attractions in there. Instead, keeping public areas or open spaces could attract more tourists than that of misused gardens, offering at least some entertainment or greenery. Secondly, giving permission to residents changing open areas to gardens to grow crops may result in nonfunctional soil content due to improper choice of pesticides or fertilizers usage. The probability of having people with mastered agricultural knowledge may be lower in some cities which means individuals might be prone to mischoose pesticides to apply for areas. This ignorance, in turn, brings about destroyed layer of soil, leaving area vestigial in the long run and even desertification.
Governments, however, can organize trainings before replacement of public areas about choosing right fertilizers, along with the tasks that should be done during every season. Not only this development boosts overall understanding of population, but also helps them to find right guidance towards taking care of their plants properly.
Another advantage of shift to gardens from open areas is that health benefits local people can gain. Firstly, such agricultural practices require physical exercise. More labour keeps population exercising, improving physical state of them, and it prevents diseases related to bones and muscles, coupled with cardiovascular illnesses too since regular exercising is beneficial to heart. Apart from keeping population healthy and fit, daily movement and also taking care of plants advance mental state, serving as stress relief and mindfulness activity. Secondly, green spaces with crops can teach students visually beyond theories and terms. Not only students with the major of agriculture can gain invaluable real-life experience by visiting gardens and having sessions about practices held on there such as effective use of chemicals, others also might find out more land use, which they can apply their knowledge on lands when they grow up, not letting areas misused or infected. Additionally, the interactivity levels of lesson would increase if they are thought outsides.
In conclusion, even though transforming public areas to garden where people can grow crops might result in misused lands because of limited accessibility and environmental risks like bad quality soil and then desertification, they are outweighed by advantages of health benefit, both mentally and physically, and better educational opportunities.

7.5

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive. Clearer topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
  • Make sure that your arguments are presented in a clear and logical order.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “This neglect by local people can left the allocated area unused” should be “This neglect by local people can leave the allocated area unused.” Refining word choice and ensuring grammatical accuracy will improve the overall clarity and effectiveness of the essay. Additionally, using a more formal tone throughout the essay will help maintain a consistent and appropriate style.

The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay contains a few grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. For example, “On the one hand, not all residents may not take part in growing plants” should be “On the one hand, not all residents may take part in growing plants.” Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including subject-verb agreement and preposition use, will improve the overall quality of the essay. Additionally, varying sentence structures and using a more formal tone throughout the essay will help maintain a consistent and appropriate style.

The essay addresses the task effectively and provides a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of transforming public parks and open spaces into gardens. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples. However, the essay could benefit from a more concise and focused introduction and conclusion. Additionally, the essay could benefit from a more formal tone and style. The writer should also ensure that all arguments are fully developed and supported with relevant examples.

Suggestions
  • Make sure to fully develop all of your arguments and support them with relevant examples.