In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of parents who are choosing to educate their children themselves at home instead of sending them school. Do the advantage of home education outweigh the disadvantage?
In some countries, many parents choose to teach their children at home instead of sending them to school. This is called home education. There are good and bad sides to this idea. I will talk about them here.
One advantage of home education is that parents can teach their children what they want. For example, they can focus on subjects that their child likes. Also, parents can protect their children from good or bad behaviour at school. Another good thing is that the child can learn at their own speed. If the child is slow the parents can help more. If the child is fast, they can learn new things quickly.
However, there are disadvantages too. At school, children makes friends and learn how to work with others. At home, they may feel lonely bacuse there are no classmates. Also, parents may not be good teachers. They might not know everything or have time to teach. For example, teaching math, science, and languages can be hard for some parents.
In conclusion, home education has both good and bad sides. It depends on the parents and the child. I think schools are better because children can make friends and learn from professional teachers.
The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected, but there are some issues with the flow of ideas and the use of cohesive devices.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to improve the flow of your ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your points and provide clear explanations and examples.
The essay uses a range of vocabulary and there is some evidence of an attempt to use less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation.
The essay uses a variety of complex structures, but there are some errors in grammar and punctuation.
The essay addresses the task and provides a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples.
Suggestions
- Provide more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph fully develops a single point and is well connected to the overall argument.