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In some countries, young people have become richer, healthier, and live longer, but they are less happy. What are the causes? What can be done to address this situation?

Although some young people are rich, healthier, and live longer, they seem less happy in several countries. I think social comparison and a lack of purpose and meaning in life are potential causes, and these issues could be alleviated with a healthy lifestyle and a sense of community and connection.
There are some reasons why some layers of the young generation are not as happy as in the past. Social comparison is a major contributor to this tendency. Nowadays, it has become common among young people to compare and judge one another against unrealistic images of success and happiness, specifically on social media—interactive technologies that allow people to create and share content amongst virtual communities and networks. This trend is particularly increasingly popular in developing countries. If young individuals constantly compare themselves, they may create feelings of envy and low self-esteem, making them demotivated. This tendency, in turn, is associated with another root cause—a lack of purpose and meaning in life. In other words, young people become unfulfilled and empty as they stop believing in achieving significant goals because of a feeling of demotivation. Furthermore, family changes can also be one of the primary reasons why young people feel empty in their lives. For example, they may feel disconnected and a sense of isolation when living far apart from their family members or because of their parents’ divorce. This factor negatively affects young individuals emotionally and mentally.
When it comes to solutions, I think that there are a variety of feasible measures that could be implemented effectively to avoid this situation. Young people must foster social connection and community and should be encouraged to prioritize face-to-face interaction over reliance on digital communication. In this case, community engagement and volunteerism should be promoted so that young individuals can get to know people from different backgrounds and be involved in social clubs or communities. As a result of such support, young people can feel a sense of belonging and have a purpose in life, focusing on various hobbies after exchanging ideas with various people, making them much more relieved, especially when interacting with their peers. With the help of these practices, young people can even evoke feelings of curiosity and willingness to try and work in many spheres, helping them grow personally and professionally. Another efficient solution to the problems could be to stimulate healthy lifestyles. I, for example, used to be in such circumstances because of the strong influence of several successful adolescents my age on social media. With the necessary education, I learnt effective stress management techniques and mindfulness, which urged me to pay attention to my own life. Moreover, discouraging the overuse of digital devices can be a practical method because mobile gadgets sometimes make people feel low self-esteem due to the influence of several well-known and successful people their age, in particular.
In conclusion, although there are some reasons why young individuals are not happy with their lives despite being rich and healthy, these problems could be solved effectively with a simply healthy lifestyle and by integrating such people into the community.

8.0

The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. The introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are clearly structured. However, there are a few instances where the flow of ideas could be improved.

Suggestions
  • Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. A variety of vocabulary and idiomatic expressions are used appropriately. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.

The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions that could be improved.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay provides relevant, extended and supported ideas. However, the essay could benefit from more specific examples to support the arguments.

Suggestions
  • Try to include more specific examples to support your arguments. This will make your writing more concrete and persuasive.