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In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Advertising has always been a key factor in the development of businesses and it is normally used to promote new models of a certain product, currently. This happens mainly because consumers are drawn to new products more and it increases curiosity of consumers, consequently companies can make more money and attract more potential costumers. In my opinion, this type of advertisement is normal as companies are there to earn money and extend in the future, and it might help a country to grow in terms of economy.
Advertising executers, these days, are focusing on promoting more new products than the old ones because a human being usually tends to be interested in new things rather than being attached to one. It also triggers workers of a certain business to be more innovative and work harder on their fields, which helps not only the business but also the employees by leading them to an academic and professional excellence. Additionally, advert makers can come up with more innovative and unusual ideas when they are working on something new as opposed to the moment when they work on the same product multiple times. For example, smartphone companies like Samsung and Apple always release new model of their phones every year; and in each promotion can witness completely different approaches and ideas for the adverts they make.
As I see it, companies focusing on showing off their new products is a norm now because customers demand it and want regular changes. We cannot argue that it is a negative development since businesses are built to earn money and provide other people with necessary goods, so it is the nature of businesses. Promoting new versions of products does not only help business owners but it also helps a country they are located in to grow economically. The more products are released, the more people are curious about them and want to buy them and want newer ones. This prompts companies to work more that requires them hiring more employees, consequently decreasing the number of unemployed people in the area.
In conclusion, even though the theme of contemporary advertisements are mostly focused on showing new products, we cannot go against them as it is their job to create more; on top of that, it is the demand put by consumers themselves. In addition, this may help in improving a country’s economic position by providing more job opportunities for jobless individuals.

6.5

The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive. Clearer topic sentences and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.

Suggestions
  • Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between ideas.
  • Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that all sentences in the paragraph support this idea.

The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical repertoire. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “advertising executers” should be “advertising executives,” and “extend in the future” should be “extend in the future.” Refining word choice and ensuring correct spelling and grammar usage will improve the overall clarity and professionalism of the essay. Additionally, using a wider variety of vocabulary will help make the essay more engaging and dynamic.

The essay demonstrates a good control of a wide range of grammatical structures, with only minor errors. The essay contains a few grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. For example, “advertising executers” should be “advertising executives,” and “companies can make more money and attract more potential costumers” should be “companies can make more money and attract more potential customers.” Paying closer attention to grammatical accuracy, including correct spelling and verb forms, will improve the overall quality of the essay. Additionally, varying sentence structures will help make the writing more engaging and dynamic.

The essay addresses the task effectively, providing a clear position throughout the response. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the reasons behind the emphasis on new products in advertising and whether it is a positive or negative development. The writer presents a clear explanation of the benefits of this practice, such as increasing consumer curiosity and driving innovation, as well as its impact on the economy. The argument is well-developed and supported with relevant points. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive. Clearer topic sentences and more explicit linking phrases would help guide the reader through the essay. Ensuring consistent punctuation and spacing will also improve readability.

Suggestions
  • Make sure to fully develop your arguments and provide specific examples to support your points.
  • Consider addressing potential counterarguments to provide a more balanced view.