It has been noted that many people who had a big impact on the world gave themselves completely to their work and did not bother with the idea of “work-life balance”. To what extent should people try to have a good work-life balance?
Many influential people give their whole life to their work, rather than maintaining a work-life balance. I believe that people should have their preferable work-life balance, instead of following any standards.
It is socially accepted that work-life balance is a mandatory setting for people, that embraces productivity without causing burnout. However, the balance between one’s professional life and personal life should be assessed depending on the goals, interests and time available. For instance: some people prefer to sacrifice their personal life in order to achieve their other goals. In contrast, other people choose their personal life over their career. People should prioritize what they think is important and create their own balance between things that they consider obligatory. For this kind of people, there is no such a balance, they are fully committed to their goals. In other cases, there are certain conditions that do not allow to balance one’s life as preferred; for example a mother has to give up her career in order to take care of her children, while her husband is working.
Nevertheless, there are cases when personal and career lives are both valued, in such cases people should create a proportional balance. From my point, people who try to find a comfortable compromise, which suits their interest, because people are inclined to prefer something even a bit more than the other thing. Life can not be predicted, which is why I believe that it is impossible to achieve a perfect balance. This is why, people should go with their feelings. For instance: someone spends the whole week working, but all of a sudden, their friends booked a vacation, and they do not want to refuse, so they travel with their friends even though it wasn’t planned at all.
In conclusion, I believe that if people have an opportunity to balance their life, the balance should suit their interests and goals. But, the balance can never by perfect, as life is unpredictable.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved. The essay follows a logical structure, but transitions between paragraphs and within paragraphs could be smoother. The introduction sets up the topic well, but the connection between different points could be enhanced with more explicit linking phrases. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points but could be more comprehensive.
Suggestions
- Use more linking words to improve the flow of ideas.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could help to illustrate the points more clearly.
The essay uses a variety of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures and is generally grammatically accurate. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected for clarity. Additionally, the use of more specific examples could help to illustrate the points more clearly.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the argument could be more fully developed in places. The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing the concept of work-life balance and the varying perspectives on it. The writer presents a clear stance, advocating for individuals to find their own balance rather than adhering to external standards. The argument is well-developed and supported by relevant examples, but the essay could benefit from a more structured approach, with a clearer introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion.
Suggestions
- Ensure that you fully develop your arguments and provide sufficient support for your points.
- Consider addressing potential counterarguments to strengthen your position.