It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is argued that, saving money for future is crucial for all the people as well as youth. I agree with this view because savings at an early age can give people financial independence and security along with investments for future goals.
One primary reason why I agree with the idea of starting to budget money is beneficial for people is that it provides financial independence. When people have their own savings, they will not be financially dependent on others. Especially young adults will be able to meet their own needs if they begin to economize their income early. In contrast, those who do not save up money, will always have to ask for financial aid from their parents, which makes them constantly rely on others’ financial help.
In addition, another significant point is that when people begin cutting the unnecessary expenses at a young age, they can achieve financial security. Early savings provide a safety net for unexpected situations, such as: medical emergencies and car repairs that can cost a huge amount of money. In this kind of urgencies people can freely use the money once they saved for future, without being stressed and thinking about where to get loans from.
A final argument is that budgeting can give individuals an opportunity of making investments in the future. Saving early allows young adolescents to work towards their future goals, whether it’s buying a car, funding education, starting a business, or purchasing a house. By saving consistently, they can accumulate enough funds to invest in these aspirations, making them more attainable.
In conclusion, the upsides of budgeting money incorporate financial independence and security, and the investments for future goals. Therefore, I am in full agreement with the argument that, saving up money for future has a high importance in every person’s lives including young people.
The essay is logically organized and ideas are connected well. However, there are a few areas where the flow of ideas could be improved.
Suggestions
- Try to use a wider range of linking words to connect your ideas more effectively.
- Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice.
The essay uses a wide range of complex structures. However, there are a few grammatical errors and awkward constructions.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout. However, the introduction could be more engaging and the conclusion could more effectively summarize the main points.
Suggestions
- Consider using a more engaging hook in your introduction to capture the reader’s attention.
- Ensure that your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay.