The essay is logically organized and the ideas are connected, but there are some areas where the flow of information could be improved. The message is generally clear, but some transitions between ideas are abrupt, making the letter feel somewhat disjointed in places. Cohesive devices are used, but some transitions could be smoother to enhance the overall flow of the letter. The organization of the content in each paragraph could be more deliberate to better support the overall coherence of the letter.

Suggestions

• Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transitions between sentences and paragraphs.
• Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central topic and that all sentences in the paragraph relate to this topic.

The letter uses a sufficient range of vocabulary and there is evidence of some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The letter demonstrates a reasonable range of vocabulary, but there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. For example, “I’m not going the lesson” should be “I’m not going to the lesson,” and “I will cut down on my work” could be rephrased for clarity. Additionally, the letter uses some simple and repetitive language that could be more varied and precise.

The letter uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are only minor errors. However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect sentence construction. The letter contains several grammatical errors that affect clarity and readability. These include issues with punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and sentence structure. For example, “I’m not going the lesson” should be “I’m not going to the lesson,” and “I will cut down on my work after paying off my loans” could be rephrased for clarity. Additionally, the letter contains some run-on sentences and fragments that could be revised for better readability.

The letter addresses the task and provides a clear position throughout the response. However, the letter could be more concise and focused. The letter effectively communicates the writer’s decision to leave the English course due to their inability to commit fully because of their job and family responsibilities. The writer provides a clear explanation of their financial obligations and their intention to prioritize work over their studies. However, the letter could be more concise and focused, as some parts reiterate the same points multiple times. The writer could also provide more specific details or examples to support their explanation.

Suggestions

• Try to be more concise and focused in your writing. Provide clear explanations for your decisions, but avoid repeating the same points multiple times.
• Consider providing specific examples to support your explanations.