Many people are afraid to leave their home because of their fear of crime.Some people believe that moe action should be taken to prevent crime, but others feel that little can be done
Some convinced that more action should be done to prevent crime, but other think that it will not make any sense.A lot of people are afraid of leaving their houses because of high rate crime.
I think that it is possible to reduce the high crime rate efficiently.
Some believed that there are solutions can ensure people feel safer outside. Firstly, violators must be punished according to severity. For those Who commit felony like murder, they should receive strict punishment like Imprisonment. Strict punishment like this could be a deterrent to potential lawbreakers, they might be scared of the consequences of being caught. This measures can lead to voluntarily surrender.
On the other hand some people recommit after being released because they cannot find a job ad make their life better again, this is also a reason contribute to the high crime rate. In prisons education or vocational training can secure employment when they being released from the prison, these measures can help them go to right path. The education system should play an important role in preventing crimes. School can provide moral lessons to help students develop a sound moral system. sine there is much misbehaviour promoted in public. If they are exposed to improper information, their moral awareness could prevent them from being misled. This could reduce delinquency and the possibilities of becoming criminals when they grow up.
Others argue that nothing can be done hold this review for several reasons. To begin with, a fear of crime is state of mind perpetuated by the media. For example, we are always bombarded with negative news stories about violence on our streets. Thus, the belief is that whatever we do to reduce levels of violence, people will be scared.
In my opinion belief is that wrongdoing is caused by wider structural issues in society that are too difficult to tackle, such as the growing income gap between the rich and the poor. Little can be done about this issue in the capitalist societies.
In conclusion, in my point of view, although tacking crimes is challenging, the prevention can be achieved through the measures mentioned above. Consequently, government and the education system should take responsibility to build a secure society
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the author’s stance.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your ideas in each paragraph.
The essay uses a wide range of vocabulary and there is evidence of less common and idiomatic language. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and spelling. The essay demonstrates a good command of a wide range of vocabulary related to the topic, such as “crime rate,” “felony,” “imprisonment,” “delinquency,” and “moral awareness.” However, there are some instances of awkward or incorrect word choices that detract from the overall clarity and effectiveness of the writing. Additionally, there are a few instances of incorrect spelling that may cause confusion for the reader.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage that can cause confusion. The essay uses a variety of sentence structures, and the grammar is generally correct, with some minor errors. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and subject-verb agreement that may cause confusion for the reader. Additionally, there are some issues with punctuation and spacing that may affect the overall clarity of the writing.
The essay addresses the task and presents a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay addresses the prompt by discussing the fear of crime and the belief that more action should be taken to prevent it. The writer presents a clear position and supports it with relevant examples and explanations. However, the essay could be improved by providing a more thorough analysis of the root causes of crime and how these could be addressed. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and reiterating the writer’s stance.
Suggestions
- Provide a more thorough analysis of the root causes of crime and how these could be addressed.
- Ensure that the conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reiterates the writer’s stance.