Many people think homeschooling is better than going to school. Is this a positive or negative development?
There is a view that homeschooling is being preferred by many parents to educate your children themselves at home. While this trend is spreaded among the parents of many nations due to pros, I believe the drawback are far greater than the benefits.
One of the biggest positive sides of homeschooling is great amount of Independence given to children. In this case, they are not obliged to be at school promptly and doing homeworks at time. Notable example, if they are provided with enough self-determination for tasks to be done whenever they want, they will not be exhausted by strict control and Stern teachers. Secondly, exact amount of time and money will be saved via to not using transportation, not going to high ranked school. In other words, it does not damage financial situation of any family and avails to possess family’s own savings for children’s future. Consequently, this savings can be allocated for younger generation’s studies at the University and shortages in any time.
Turning to the other side of the argument, although more people choose homeschooling, drawbacks are ubiquitous every time. Firstly, children would be reliant on only their parent’s knowledge instead of highly qualified teachers at schools. Moreover, children will be able to work with your peers, because group discussions can help to reinforce students’ grasp of complex topics. Furthermore, educational programs and curriculums in study establishments bridge the gap between theoretical knowledge and practical application, providing students with hands-on experience in their field of study compared to homeschooling can not offer these privileges. Lastly, studying at home may arise social problems which are at the top of the rank these days. To be more specific, children used to being homeschooling are deprived from interacting with their peers and sharing knowledge and opinions which causes lack of sharpening their mind.
In conclusion, both sides are considered, advantages with more independence and their own way for learning, drawbacks with socializing problems, lack of educational circumstances. I consider schools are always monopolized in the learning ways.
The essay is logically organized and the progression of ideas is clear. However, there are some issues with the use of cohesive devices and the overall cohesion of the essay. The essay follows a logical structure, but the use of cohesive devices is sometimes inaccurate or missing, making the connection between ideas less smooth. Additionally, the conclusion could be more effective in summarizing the main points and clearly stating the writer’s position.
Suggestions
- Use a variety of cohesive devices to ensure smooth transition between ideas.
- Make sure to fully develop your conclusion to effectively summarize the main points and clearly state your position.
The essay demonstrates a good command of a broad lexical resource. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice. The essay demonstrates a good range of vocabulary, with some less common and idiomatic language. However, there are a few instances of awkward or incorrect word choice that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms and there are few grammatical errors. However, there are some errors in article and preposition usage that could be revised for clarity. The essay demonstrates a good control of a wide range of grammatical structures, with some errors that do not impede overall understanding. However, there are a few instances of incorrect verb forms and sentence structures that could be revised for clarity and accuracy.
The essay addresses the task effectively, presenting a clear position throughout the response. However, the argument could be more fully developed and supported with specific examples. The essay clearly addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of homeschooling. The writer presents a clear position that the drawbacks of homeschooling outweigh the benefits and supports this position with relevant arguments. However, the essay could be improved by providing more specific examples to support the arguments.
Suggestions
- Include more specific examples to support your arguments.
- Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and is well supported by the rest of the essay.